He opens my door to go snooping
he’ll poke through my stuff when he can
when I paid him that massive deposit
he seemed such a civilised man.
Now I’m walking on eggshells and nervy
I wake in the night feeling vexed
of late he’s been giving the glad-eye
What, sexual bonuses next?
He’s timing my stints in the bathroom
(the loo rolls are all locked away)
he tells me it’s extra for water -
it’s weird cause I already pay.
(the loo rolls are all locked away)
he tells me it’s extra for water -
it’s weird cause I already pay.
So pity us downtrodden tenants
I lodge in a shed out the back
today I was hanging my washing
My landlord shouts: ‘Lacy and black!’
I lodge in a shed out the back
today I was hanging my washing
My landlord shouts: ‘Lacy and black!’
I must say my shed is expensive
10 square, with a put-me-up bed -
for water a tap in the garden
no shower; a hose-down instead.
It’s 90 plus quid every Monday
My landlord is doing me proud,
he crows: ‘ Aren’t you lucky to be here -
remember no friends are allowed!’
10 square, with a put-me-up bed -
for water a tap in the garden
no shower; a hose-down instead.
It’s 90 plus quid every Monday
My landlord is doing me proud,
he crows: ‘ Aren’t you lucky to be here -
remember no friends are allowed!’
He’s timing my stints in the bathroom
(the loo rolls are all locked away)
he tells me it’s extra for water
it’s weird cause I already pay.
(the loo rolls are all locked away)
he tells me it’s extra for water
it’s weird cause I already pay.
So pity us downtrodden tenants
In under-stair cupboards and sheds
our toilet facilities rationed -
a nightmare in put-me-up beds!
In under-stair cupboards and sheds
our toilet facilities rationed -
a nightmare in put-me-up beds!
© S.O. Fasrus
Note: image by S.O. Fasrus
Note: image by S.O. Fasrus
